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Transgender London |
b06/26/09 |
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Who Is Behind All This? Okay so there really is a body behind this. First of all, this website is my own work from the aspect of research and writing. It is not sponsored except through your generous donations. I have put this site together to help others who have gender questions either for themselves, ones they love, professional information, or just out of curiosity. Everyone is welcome here. My name is Kimberley. Well, that isn't my legal name but it is the one I am known by in the transgender community. I like to think I have a fairly good reputation for being level headed in all of this. However I am equally vocal about transgressions, ignorance, intolerance, prejudice and bigotry regarding transgender. You can find my objections throughout this site. I know that I am very supportive of people from all corners who are having difficulty. I didn't select my name, it selected me. I never knew anyone with that name and I guess it was just there from somewhere that I dont know about. Names seem to be a big thing with some people, but honestly, it is only a name. It isn't who I am or what I am, it is a name, no more and no less. Still, I relate to it and at some subconscious level, identify with it. I have been transgendered all my life, from my earliest memories. I am a transsexual if you really need a label. I detest labels because they confine you to a given set of rules or definitions and no one can fit into any one box. We are all much more than a single label. What is important here is that I have not transitioned nor can I see that I will in the foreseeable future. I would like to do so and would, if all things were equal. So again, if you need a label then I am a non-op transsexual or just plain Transgender (which I prefer). The real problem with any kind of label come the preconceptions and stereotypes established elsewhere in society. I am well educated and to meet me you would never in your wildest dreams imagine I am transsexual. I am not limp wristed, or talk with a high falsetto voice or use exaggerated body language. I am as normal in appearance as any male. Surprised? Those who know of my being transsexual were (when I came out to them), without exception, surprised and all stated they had no idea. I was raised and educated in London. I have worked here most of my life. My friends and roots are here. There is no question of that. My life follows the typical transsexual stereotype. I "learned" to be male even though it caused a great deal of stress. There was a lot of mental abuse and some physical just to reinforce my "maleness". This is not an uncommon story. I took a macho job and career after high school and college. I worked my way through the ranks of the factory floor to owning my own business. I married young and have a family that I absolutely adore. Yes, that too is very typical of the transsexual. So, I am not gay unless you consider that I love women. In fact, men hold very little interest for me at any time. But, let's not start confusing sex and gender at this point. There is this misconception (urban myth) that I and others like me are women trapped in a man's body. I have not yet met any transsexual, myself included who can completely relate to that. It was something the media latched on to forty plus years ago to explain something they didn't understand. I can admit to feeling female and knowing that my male genitalia is wrong for me. That is an admission more commonly identified in the transsexual community. Every person on this planet is a mix of gender, inherited from their parents and those around them. Every woman has male personality traits just as every man has some female personality traits. This in no way identifies them as transgender. The difference is that their physical sex matches their sense of gender. This is the same for heterosexual and the gay communities. The sense of gender held and sexual identification are the same despite sexual orientation or preference. We in the community call "normally gendered" people cisgendered. Quite frankly most of us would prefer to be that way if given the choice. If we have the choice and luck to transition, then we too become cisgendered since our "brain sex" and physical sex are the same. What every transsexual can say is that they just "know" their gender is wrong for their biological sex, and again, this has no bearing on sexual preference. With me, my basic core is female but I also have a lot of male characteristics. I guess you could say that somewhere during pregnancy, the purchase order got lost so I ended up with the wrong waterworks. Nothing more or less. I am still who I am with all my strengths and weaknesses. It is just that my physical sex doesn't match my sense of gender (brain sex). There are only a few people on this planet who know who I am (legally) and that I am a transsexual. My wife is one of them. None of this has been easy for my partner and to be honest I dont know why she didn't walk out a long time ago. I am glad she didn't because she is my rock and I love her to bits. Even so, I am a realist and know that this is a possibility at any time. So, overall I am largely closeted. Oh sure I will don a pair of jeans and top to go out, but they will be largely indistinguishable from male clothing unless you really look. You just wont see me in a skirt or dress on the street. I guess I am just a basic down home girl. I have interests in fashion (oh duh!) music and photography. I enjoy cooking (and eating) and a glass of good wine. I enjoy chatter with girlfriends. I don't know what more I can say except to enjoy what you read here and if you learn something great, if you gain some insight, compassion and or empathy; fantastic! If you have comments or questions, please dont hesitate to write. Huggs to All, Kimberley.
CONTACT INFORMATION Email: TGLondon@execulink.com Cut and paste the above address into your email client. (The hyperlink is removed to reduce the unwanted effects of web crawlers and bots.) For other very obvious reasons I will not publish other contact information. If the need for personal contact is required, then send an email with your contact information and the reasons for the personal contact. I will make the appropriate arrangements. |
This site was last updated 01/26/09